UPDATE: The 2021 Royal Rumble is in the books. Check at the bottom of the post to check out the results and see how right or wrong we were.
*blows dust off wrestling content on nappyafro*
I have been meaning to re-assemble The FRO Horsemen for a minute to talk about some pro wrestling. This Sunday’s Royal Rumble seems like as good as time as any. Who doesn’t love the Royal Rumble?
Saule Wright, GQ-Blu, and I will be picking who we think should win, who we think will win, and predict a surprise entrant for both the men’s and women’s Royal Rumble. Enjoy. – B-Easy
WOMEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE
WHO I THINK SHOULD WIN THE WOMEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE: BIANCA BELAIR
This is the one I don’t want to write. Bianca has been one of the most intriguing wrestlers and unique personalities since she got signed. I fucks with her forreal. I don’t see the point in making her climb the way she has specifically with the losses she shouldn’t have. She’s OVER OVER. If WWE wanted to do the right thing, she wins.
WHO I THINK WILL WIN THE WOMEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE: TRISH STRATUS
However, WWE is gonna drag this out. They’ll want to solidify Sasha before Binaca gets a shot OR be sure to have Sasha lose to a legend as we all love Sasha anyway. Enter Trish Stratus. Showing my hand a bit as I think she will be a surprise return AND win the match. Sasha and Trish have been playing nice in media for a minute and that dream match has been discussed… I think now is the time. In my opinion, Sasha is one of the best women wrestlers ever already. Having a match with Trish would really do wonders for her. WWE universe holds Trish in high regard so a match, won or lose, would really put her on. Trish being transitional for Bianca who would then be a prime target for Sasha looks amazing for 2022.
WOMEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE SURPRISE ENTRANT: TRISH STRATUS
WHO I THINK SHOULD WIN THE WOMEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE: BIANCA BELAIR
Full disclosure, I was worried about Bianca. While the EST is supremely talented and dope in the ring, her main roster call up seemed doomed from the start. She appeared more as a manager to the Street Profits and had random appearances in matches for a while until she got to Smackdown, where her Survivor Series showing and current feud with Bayley have pushed her to the top of the Blue Brand’s Women’s card. I’ve also went from casual fan to super supporter after watching her discuss her journey with mental health on her WWE network show. As someone who felt they over-scripted Bianca (because WWE doesn’t know how to write dialogue for Black wrestlers who they don’t let write their own shit, a la New Day) her true personality has been shining a lot more lately and I’m here for her coronation as Women’s Champ.
WHO I THINK WILL WIN THE WOMEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE: ALEXA BLISS
This is tough. Alexa Bliss is one of my favorite superstars, man or woman. She is oozing with personality and her ring work has improved every year. As a multi time woman’s champ I feel like her career is what Miz’s should be, but I’m not gonna center a man in a post about the women’s division, cuz I’m an ally like that. Anywhoooo…
Bliss has always been dope and I generally support everything she does, but I’m not a fan of The Fiend stuff. And I don’t even know if it’s her fault as much as I don’t think a lot of the stuff they’re doing works without an audience reacting to it. Plus the stories felt like it’s been in a holding place for months. It seems like we’re heading for another FireFly Fun House match at Mania, so let Alexa be in that and make a new star out of Bianca Belair.
WOMEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE SURPRISE ENTRANT: LITA and/or TRISH STRATUS
WHO I THINK SHOULD WIN THE WOMEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE: BIANCA BELAIR
I ain’t gonna keep you too long because without even looking at the picks of my fellow FRO Horsemen, I know that we all picked Bianca Belair in this slot. And for good reason. WWE should let Belair be the first woman to start the Rumble at #1 and win it. It just makes sense with the EST/athletic gimmick
Plus how can you not want her to win after that WWE Chronicle documentary?
WHO I THINK WILL WIN THE WOMEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE: BIANCA BELAIR
I talked my self into believing that Bianca Belair will actually win the Women’s Royal Rumble.
WOMEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE SURPRISE ENTRANT: BECKY LYNCH?
MEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE
WHO I THINK SHOULD WIN THE MEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE: DANIEL BRAYN
We’re in the Era of Reigns and without fail, this is just about picking the person to lose to Reigns. Raw is a really tough watch, as are most programs right now, but I think this is an opportunity to breathe some new life and energy into the show. Insert Daniel Bryan. Bryan has been over since he signed his WWE contract. We love to love him, we love to hate him, we just love DBry. I think the history is there and having him headline again would be great heading into the new WWE business venture. He should win the Rumble, but he’s gonna lose to Roman.
WHO I THINK WILL WIN THE MEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE: EDGE
Now, that said, WWE is pretty predictable. Edge return lacked umph but I think the E wants to give him another run just as a redemption story. You can get another documentary out of Edge winning the belt again, even if it is transitional. You can also get another documentary out of spear vs spear, hair vs hair, old vs new, etc. The storylines are endless. I think Edge WILL win and then lose at mania.
MEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE SURPRISE ENTRANT: DAMIEN PRIEST
WHO I THINK SHOULD WIN THE MEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE: BIG E
I think Black people of all races everywhere (you’re a real one if you got that Undercover Brother reference) were a little heartbroken when they split the New Day up. But we’ve been hearing about Big Epsilon getting a single’s push for years now. What better time than now to put the rocket on the big guy? We all know Vince loves him some big beefy men (s/o to the Feel The Power podcast) and with reports out recently that McMahon wasn’t satisfied with giants Keith Lee and Otis, what’s the reason for not giving Big E a chance to run at the top of the card? He’s been in main event angles before during the Kofimania run as well as when New Day started as heels, the man has put in the work.
WHO I THINK WILL WIN THE MEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE: ADAM COLE …maybe?
Ok so this was kinda hard. The dirty screens (what B-Easy calls the Dirt Sheets) have been saying Daniel Bryan is next in line to challenge Roman Reigns. Bryan has enough clout that he doesn’t need a Rumble win to get a title shot. Bryan’s been teasing retiring lately (I’m not crying, you’re crying) and you could book it as Bryan being in the final four of the Rumble, losing and questioning if he’s still got what it takes. He cuts a promo Friday night about not knowing what the future holds for him and then Roman comes out and makes fun of him and calls him washed. Boom, feud on.
Undisputed Era is spinning its wheels on NXT and Adam Cole feels like a second fiddle in his own crew. Why not create a surprise win that’ll get the internet talking?
Or Seth Rollins comes back and wins it all. That maybe more accurate. Idk
MEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE SURPRISE ENTRANT: SANTINO MARELLA
WHO I THINK SHOULD WIN THE MEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE: CESARO
Okay, hear me out. I know the Swiss Superman has best the internet’s favorite wrestler for years. But basically with still no fans in attendance on televised pro wrestling shows, why not give Cesaro a run at the top now? If he won the Royal Rumble and went to the main event at Wrestlemania 37, he wouldn’t even have to win a top title; he just needs to be elevated up the card. Now if he did win one of the top titles at Mania, you can make it a feel good story in the vein of Eddie Guerrero and [name redacted] at the end of WrestleMania 20. Wait, is there a way to fantasy book Cesaro versus Daniel Bryan at WrestleMania 37?
WHO I THINK WILL WIN THE MEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE: EDGE
This will be Edge’s second Royal Rumble in two years and both will be a return from injury. I’m actually not 100% on the Rated-R Superstar winning the Rumble, but he is a big name, and seeing that Randy Orton is busy playing with fire with The Fiend and Alexa Bliss, he is probably fued-less going into Sunday. So it kinda makes send that the Ultimate Opportunist wins a second Royal Rumble. Again.
MEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE SURPRISE ENTRANT: JOHN CENA
2021 ROYAL RUMBLE RESULTS
WHO ACTUALLY WON THE WOMEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE: BIANCA BELAIR
WHO ACTUALLY WON THE MEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE: EDGE
SURPRISE ENTRANTS IN WOMEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE: JILLIAN HALL, VICTORIA, ALICIA FOX
SURPRISE ENTRANTS IN MEN’S ROYAL RUMBLE: CARLITO, THE HURRICANE, CHRISTIAN, KANE (?)