Jay Z
Alternative profession: Subliminal Advertising Executive
Ever since Nas forced Jay to breathe straight “Ether” back in 2001 Hov has since changed his battle strategies. Not one to quickly call out names anymore, Jay Z is now known to diss others the subtle way (Li’’ Wayne on both T.I.’s “Watch What You Say To Me” and Watch the Throne’s “H*A*M” or Cam and Jim Jones on “Dig A Hole”) without using direct names.
This is why he’d be perfect at making people feel a certain way without them even noticing. He could take up an office job for a giant corporation like Coca-Cola or McDonald’s and help send out suggestive messages to viewers anyone being none the wiser.
He’d be perfect for the job. The guy managed to convince people for years that Memphis Bleek was worth listening to, I’m sure he could persuade you to buy a can of Coke every now and then.
Backup profession: Lamp-post
The guy spent enough time under one selling crack and claims to be a “trillion watt light bulb”. ‘Nuff said.
Backup backup profession: President of Coldplay fan club.
HOVA likes being the president of companies. Why not one for the fan club of his favorite band?