If Rappers Weren’t Rappers Pt. 1

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Ross

Rick Ross

Alternative Profession: Lawyer

Company Name: Rawse tha Bawse: Attorney at Law

If Ross can get outed as a former C.O. and ascend to even higher fame as a coke rapper then he could easily be a defense lawyer. Couldn’t you picture him as a Johnnie Cochran type or even his comedic portrayal Jackie Chiles? I bet you can see it now. Ross’ fat belly protruding out, brown suspenders holding up his pants, pacing around the court-room, defending his client in his deep raspy voice. I can also picture his defendant being 100% guilty but that not mattering to Ricky Ross. His client may have already been caught out before for the same crime and this time with eleven witnesses. One being Jerry Orbach and the other being David Caruso and Ross would still get them off the hook.

If the man can make (good) songs about getting rich off crime and the people still buy it then why not a stint at being a lawyer eh? Plus he could be one of those criminal lawyers like Saul Goodman from Breaking Bad that has bus bench ads. Also I like to image him with a catch phrase he screams out after you’re proven not guilty. Your family and friends are clapping. The judge is looking very unimpressed then out from Ross comes a big “UGGH!!!”

Case closed.

Backup profession: Used Car Salesman

Company Name: SHMMG (Second Hand Maybach Music Group)

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